I thought love was timeless, unconditional, powerful, and everlasting. I thought love could heal, bring hope, joy, and warmth… How can something so beautiful and pure cause so much pain? Why do the people we love the most hurt us?
You could spend years feeling nearly inseparable with a soul then one day they just disappear… Never to return.
Or they change from the person you once loved and knew so well. Or maybe you never knew them that well afterall…
Some use love as a bargaining chip. A tool to manipulate and guilt-trip with. This is NOT love.
Others cling to an individual in the name of love. Hoping that if they stay close enough that the love will last forever. Often times these relationships are controlling, possessive, and full of jealousy. This is NOT love. It is toxic.
Then there’s the one who tells you that no one else will ever love you as much as they do. This is NOT love. It is brainwashing and forcing you to settle and live in fear.
There’s the lover (or hater rather) who creates rules and tries to tell you who you can see and who you are allowed to care for. They are insecure and easily threatened. This is not love. This person is a ruler/dictator. RUN the other way.
There is that person who keeps you around and likes to cozy up when they are feeling down, but can quickly turn distant and treat you like an option. Don’t EVER settle for 2nd best you deserve the VERY BEST and NOTHING less.
There is the arrogant, entitled player idiot who bores you with stories about how all these women want to be with him. “Go for it buddy! I’m bored out of my mind with your stories. Go get your dreamgirl. She’s definitely not me.”
There is the distant wanderer who is stuck in the past and just cannot let go of that girl. “She sounds amazing. You should go find her! I want to spend time with people who can be present with ME right here and NOW!”
None of these descriptions will ever turn into true love. Love is NOT a fairytale. It never was and never will be. Love is more like writing your life-story. It will not always be blue skies, sunshine, and happiness. Our lives are full of ups and downs, changes, chapters, volumes, heartbreak, tragedy, romance, adventures, moments that take our breath away, hard times, lessons, illness, pain, work, and so much more. A person who can become a true friend and nurture a friendship with you through all of that. See you at your very best, help you pull through your worst times, and still be in your corner uplifting and cheering you on. That is a true friend and can turn into true love.
So why do the people we love sometimes leave?… I do not have the answer. Make the most of the time you have with the people you love. Sometimes we only get snapshots, but they can be memories that last forever.
True love need not only apply to romantic relationships. Share your love with the people who respect you, treat you right, and appreciate you.
It is a waste of time and energy to spend your love on someone who cannot even recognize that you are a beautiful and true blessing.
I pity the fool who fails to see how beautifully amazing you truly are.