Hello My Dear Darling Friends,
Last week was a very sad week overall. On Monday, our Anatomy & Physiology professor informed us that our dance professor had to go on medical leave. We were all disappointed, but hopeful that someday he would recover and we would see him again. On Tuesday I was delighted to find out that my Ballet Instructor was going to take over for Professor K. Wednesday was a nice little break, but I was still very stressed about falling behind in Chemistry.
On Thursday we found out that Professor K had a seizure and was in a coma. It would also be the day that they would take him off of the respirator. We were all so heartbroken to hear this tragic news. Less than two months ago he was directing us all through our final performance. Little did we know that it would be his final performance too.
On Friday evening we found out that he had passed away…That night we had a huge thunder and lightening storm. We even lost power, but the loss of power barely compared to the loss of a beloved teacher and mentor.
My heart felt full of grief for the rest of the week and it felt impossible for me to concentrate on school work. I also felt like garbage because I spent the entire week eating whatever I wanted after 7 days of Eating Clean. I do have to say that eating clean feels way better on the body even though it is a daily test of willpower.
On Saturday morning I woke up and got ready for ballet,. I thought I left at a decent time, but I got stuck in traffic because an officer was stopping cars at an intersection for Capital City Marathon Runners. I guess that is a worthy enough cause :). What usually would have taken less than 2 minutes took over 20 minutes. I realized that I was going to be late for class. I was so close to turning around, but I walked my leotarded butt into class anyways and I am so glad that I did!
It felt good to dance and move, but my sadness followed me home and I felt paralyzed for the rest of the weekend. I guess grief is a process that cannot be rushed…
Monday came too fast and I pried myself out of bed in time to go to my Chemistry lab. I danced and swam on Tuesday and this morning I walked myself to chemistry lecture (sweating a little bit through the group problems, but still sitting through it all). And now here we are!
May:
Mix It Up!
- Get creative.
- Re-organize your life.
- Paint Something.
- Do something you’ve never done before.
- Go on an adventure!
Oh, and have I mentioned that I have started eating clean again? This time I am taking a less radical approach. It feels so great to be back on track!!! I hate the feeling of being behind, but I often let it get in my way. Last night my boyfriend gave me some great advice. He said, “of course it’s hard, it’s chemistry. Once you get the fundamentals down it won’t be as tough, but getting the fundamentals is challenging. Right now, just focus on learning as much as you possibly can about chemistry.” That helped me feel more open-minded about learning and renewed my excitement!
Love, Joy, and Blessings Always,
❤ Alana Xoxoxo
